Celebrity – most misunderstood human asshole.
Every smile she fakes every tweet he makes –
for haemorrhoid ads and panty pads Kerching!
Listen to that sweet ring a ding ding.
Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Get naked for charity
Death – hunger –
dead babies in Bosnia
– ride that gravy train
like a bucking goat on heat –
take snappy snaps when you defecate and sleep.
Cloying – non-stop chin rubbing Uriah Heep!
Money nostrils flare – bum lick kisses with quacking billionaires
Gucci eye glistens – they endorse –
cue the applause – we all sit back and listen.
Get an invite to the palace.
Three-hour lunches at Soho House –
and at five thirty white orchids arrive at the front office.
‘Thank you,’ to the pimping pariahs of the corporate regime
The black teeth of greed – grinning – backstage all-access VIP.
Sell virgin hair
skinny mint tea
and silver tongued fantasies.
There’s a photo op pinned to the thigh of a pop sex prima donna
and a million likes up for grabs for her pet iguana.
Party in a limo –
he’ll be your bestie for a negotiated fee –
a Rolex watch – all expenses guaranteed.
Celebrity – A weapon of mass deflection.
Red rope segregation.
Let’s dissect Kate’s snake skin shoes
and Johnny’s latest Twitter feud.
‘Don’t you know who I am?’
‘A lick spitting Spaniel for the establishment?’
Fuck celebrity – safe – homogenised beauty –
fairy dust popularity – tax haven security and that weekend spread in Hello magazine.
Branded prostitution buys you riches and fame
but when the lights dim and you’re broken – too old to play the game –
as a foot print on this treasured earth ask yourself
How much are you really worth?
Pic: Elena Caldera