Telephone Sex

 

(Five Haikus)

My phone is quite dumb.
Of course I have a smart phone,
But a dumb smart phone.

It does not play tunes,
Quack, ring, or make any sound.
Sometimes it vibrates

Discreet, noiseless.
Often I feel it humping
My thigh, silently.

Like a dog jacking
Off against your shin, futile
And lacking in taste.

I do not love my
Smart phone; not because it’s dumb
But because it’s vile.


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