‘Oh yes we’ve gone completely plastic. The plants they have these days, so realistic, you simply can’t tell the difference unless you get up really close. No weeding. Chemical sprays take care of that. Flowers in bloom all year round. I don’t think we’d ever go back to natural gardening. Even the lawn’s artificial, though you’d never guess would you, looking at it from here? No need to mow, and we save a fortune not having to water. Of course it was quite expensive. We went for the very best quality we could find. But this is meant to last twenty years. More wine anyone? Without all the hassle you’ve got time to enjoy life. Show them the topiary, Barry…’



Simon Collings


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