“So doc, I read in the Mail today, you and I we’ve moved on from medical process to outcome measures, payment by results. So at last you’re going to be nice to me, I feel better…you get paid. I can’t lose.”
“Well I’m sorry to say it’s not quite as simple as that. Putting it bluntly if you don’t get better I don’t get paid.”
“So get me better – no problem – that’s what They say you have to do.”
“How do I put this… all humans… you included are imperfect… we don’t all work perfectly – the mind and the self within it, are the most complex thing in the universe.”
“But you’re a doctor – the government is paying you to sort it.”
“Well the doctor can only go so far – I’m not God ! ”
“Well I’ve been doing my best, these last 15 years to live with bipolar. Ok, the lithium helps but sometimes I just can’t hold it together. I lose it.”
“Look, why don’t you just stop feeling sorry for yourself. If you don’t get better I’m finished.”
“Aren’t I doing my best Doc.”
“Well that’s not good enough. We’ve used to have all those Asylums to care for the mad. It was pointless, better use them as luxury flats. Then we got social pressures on the nonconforming sick and mad. Now, we’ve got social pressures on the doctors.”
“You’ll just have to cure us.”
“Canute couldn’t make the tide go out. Freud couldn’t make everybody happy even Prozac and LSD are disappointments, how am I meant to cure incurable mental illnesses……I’m sorry .”
“Well doc, that’s just too bad , you got to do better! A new world of payments by results is being rolled out! Now this minute we are go!”
“Chum, I got news for you, if you don’t get better it now goes down on my record not yours. But I’m not mad, but you are. The government is going to punish me for failing to cure you. I’m very sorry to say that the best way for me to deal with it is to get rid of you. You are cured. I will discharge you into the community. Lost to follow up! Out of sight out of mind… nothing personal you know. But bye, bye ”
