Here we are, ‘Hermit Wanted’. ‘Lower Loxley Hall seeks to engage a person of suitable character and demeanour to occupy the hermitage, originally built in 1760, situated within the great park. The hermitage consists of a small grotto, constructed from rocks, which has recently been refurbished to comply with health and safety standards.’ Sounds comfy. ‘The post-holder will occupy the grotto when the house and grounds are open to the public. The successful candidate will be required to grow their hair and beard,’ – you already qualify on that one – ‘and to don eighteenth century costume, which will be supplied. Suitable reading matter, food and fresh water will also be provided.’ Sounds perfect. You can sit there reading all day, lunch is free, and you’ll save on your heating bills.
Painting detail by Moritz von Schwind