That last night we kissed we exchanged numbers.
When it comes to women I never text or phone first I always leave it up to them.
It wasn’t until the fourth night later I got a text from her and it said: Hi, Mr Butterface!
We text for a while then we talked on the phone for a few hours and we decided to meet up the next night.
I took her to the bar my friend worked in to play pool and listen to the jukebox.
When I walked her home we got to a part of our town where it is a big walkway and it is lit up by street lights.
The snow was falling lightly and I stopped her – grabbed her gently and looked into her beautiful eyes and kissed her softly.
We talked again later that night and I asked her about the other guy who was pursuing her.
She told me that she told him to leave her alone because she found the love of her life… me!
We were officially in a relationship and we were so delighted!
We were so in love that she used to scheme school to be with me.
We kissed everywhere and got told off by an OAP couple in a café.
I bought her a shit load of gifts to show my love for her as much as I could – like a rose or a lily every few weeks!
One time we had a fight over the phone and I was travelling to Dublin the next morning and she ran from her house as I left mines and met me out of breath near the bus station just to tell me she loved me…
She went to Scotland with her parents for over a week and surprised me a day before she was meant to come back and showered me with gifts – like handmade bracelets that I never took off until they broke…
But… there was a dark side to our relationship, thanks to me!
One night we fell out in a bar and I walked home and punched our bathroom mirror and I cut my knuckles and I had to get it stitched up…
I would get so depressed at times that I would say to her sadly to leave me and go and find someone else…
One night she actually said to me while we were walking around our hometown: ‘if you want me to leave you I will, just say it again?’
I said it again and it was over!
I couldn’t even walk her back home that night, but what I didn’t know till later on that night: that she had cried all the way home when I left her alone…
We got back together at 4am that night, but it would be officially over very soon and I think we both knew it!
She wanted us to spend more time apart and do things with our friends…
One night she had her friends over at hers and they asked her: ‘are you really happy just being with Paul for the rest of your life?’
She told them she didn’t need anyone else other than me, but I know it got her thinking.
We broke up again not long after that and it lasted for a week.
I had seen her earlier that day with her mother in our town, but we never touched eyes.
I was skating with my boys at a skate park in Derry that night and when I was finished I grabbed my phone and she was ringing me and I took it outside.
We had a very in depth chat and things would have to change if we were to be together.
I asked if we were together again and she said ‘yes!’
I screamed at the top of my lungs outside the skate park: ‘I LOVE YOU H!!!!’
We both laughed and my boys left me off at hers and we kissed like that first night we fell in love with each other without even knowing each other amongst that music!
I moved in with my mum to be closer to her and make her happier.
We were back together for a few days and she wanted us all to go out and have a drink together (some of her friends and mines).
Of course I said.
She wanted me to lighten up a bit and stop being so serious like my poems and stories and other writings…
I ended up getting pretty drunk that night and when we got a lift back home with her mother I started to talk shite: ‘you know something, your daughter doesn’t really love me ha ha…’ – so on and so forth!
The next day we met up while I was working on my bedroom in my mum’s house and she did look very displeased.
Later on that night I was chatting with her on Facebook (I joined to keep her happy as well).
She said: ‘it’s over Paul.’
I lost control and ran over to her house and discussed it with her, but she had nothing else to add to what she said except for: ‘I’m sorry.’
I asked for some of the stuff she took from mine to watch and the money she was keeping for me to buy Christmas presents with…
She had a little ‘Paul Box’ where she kept all of our memories in and handed me my money and the DVDS and videos I gave her to watch and she walked me to the door.
As I stood there feeling like a lost bee in that winter – I asked for one last kiss like the first one we ever had and she smiled a sad smile and we kissed under those now lonely stars (for me mainly – not so much for her).
The next year of my life was going to be the toughest I was ever going to go through and I would never be the same ever again!
The end of a relationship never has to be the end of you: you’ll learn that!
Believe me: NO BITCH IS WORTH THAT!
Even the flowers were in love with me
On the floor
Of the grass
I told her
I loved her
I never knew
As I picked it up
That a flower
Could look like that
She thought about my cock in the bar
I was sitting
Probably lying down
In my bed
In a shared illusive flat
I knew she was at the bar
I’m sure I was writing
Or probably reading
I heard a knock at the door
In a still young night
Why are you hear
She told me to go into her part time bedroom
Without hardly saying another thing
She took off my trousers
I did nearly stop her with my tongue
But she gave me her first blowjob
It didn’t feel like any other
We were in love