Scientists Discover Defective Tory Gene

Professor Mark Blowfelt, overseeing the scientist’s work was keen to explain his team’s findings, saying, ‘Of course were all suspicious of the Conservative gene pool from the beginning. Mainly because no one in their right mind would be a Tory, indicating other biological factors beyond their control. Now we have discovered the Tory Gene everything makes sense. Carriers of the defective gene are merely at the whim of this unbalanced DNA structure much like pedophiles,serial killers, merchant bankers and other psychopaths. This explains their political thinking in general and current policies such as; forcing terminal cancer patients to work, forcing doctors to work seven days a week, Trident, Micheal Gove and their constant need to be at war with as many countries as possible. It would also appear that some Tories have more than one of these troublesome little buggers running around inside them. For example Katie Hopkins’ legs and head are probably entirely made out of this substandard biological material.’