Months ago, I was working in a company I choose not to name—not out of fear, but out of clarity. Because what happened there is not about one place; it is about a mindset.
I was called in by senior management—ironically, by a millennial female in a position of authority—and accused of wearing a crop top. A crop top. Let that sink in. What I was actually wearing was a tank top—fully covering, paired with a full-sleeved shrug. Layered. Decent. Professional. Covered in every possible way. Yet, I was reduced to an assumption, a label, a careless misjudgment.
This wasn’t about clothing. This was about perception without knowledge. Authority without awareness.
And let’s address the most basic question—when I am not in a client-facing role, when I am working in a backend position, how does it matter what I am wearing? My deliverables, my performance, my output—those should be the only concern. Policing a female employee’s outfit in such a context is not just unnecessary, it is absolutely meaningless.
And I remember—years ago—working under another company and a Gen Z male boss who saw me, not scrutinized me. I was praised like, “baggy jeans, tank top, khule baal, mehek ti hui tu”—words that didn’t diminish me, but uplifted my spirit. He knew how to appreciate someone’s presence, someone’s individuality, someone’s dressing—without turning it into a courtroom.
That contrast stays with me.
A millennial woman in authority, accusing another woman without even understanding the difference between a tank top and a crop top. And a Gen Z man, appreciating a woman with clarity, respect, and awareness.
Because what is more regressive than a generation that claims modernity but cannot even distinguish between reality and assumption? What is more disappointing than leadership that confuses control with professionalism?
And here is the uncomfortable truth—sometimes, a woman becomes the harshest judge of another woman. Not out of strength, but out of conditioning. Without understanding, without awareness, without even getting the facts right. Policing instead of empowering.
Meanwhile, the very men we are taught to be cautious of sometimes do what leadership fails to do—they uplift, they encourage, they create an environment where you can breathe, work, and exist without shrinking yourself.
So what do we call this?
Not professionalism. Not progress. Not empowerment.
This is disguised insecurity wearing the mask of authority.
And I refuse to accept it.
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Tiyasha Khanra
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