‘A heavy metal band stole my snowshoes,’
said Craig. ‘When I tried to report it,
so I could claim insurance, the policeman
turned out to be on holiday all week.
Apparently there’s no crime in Norway.
They were gigging in the library
that’s the furthest north in the world.
The band who hold world records
for volume, was playing in a library
while we were on our honeymoon.
I dreamt about being asked to play
guitar in recompense for the theft,
strutting my stuff and soloing
as books shook on the shelves
and local readers shushed, but
actually, we had a quiet night in,
I mean it was our honeymoon.
Emily didn’t want to go out
and I didn’t want to get wet feet.
I liked those snowshoes, too.’
© Rupert M Loydell