‘It’s a film about grief, but grieving doesn’t mean sitting around crying
– for this couple it means considering and modifying their beliefs
about death, time and memory.’
– Dan North, ‘Don’t Look Now: “Did You Really See Her?”‘
‘Part of it is surely existential—our lives are temporary and inscrutable;
death is compulsory and forever—but another part feels more quotidian
and incremental, the slow accumulation of ordinary losses. […] We are
always losing, or leaving, or being left, in ways both minor and vast.’
– Amanda Petruschi, ‘The Sad Dads of the National’, The New Yorker
‘One of the nice things about film is that you can obliterate time. You
can reverse or wind the film backwards. You can slow it down, you can
speed it up. You can obliterate hundreds of years with a cut.’
– Bernard Rose, ‘Mystic Nic: in praise of Nicolas Roeg’
1. DISPLACEMENT THEORY
Shots in the church, moments before they happen.
Conversation is already a ghost, disembodied words.
She cannot shake the ache of losing, he knows
he is utterly helpless, left behind untangling grief.
Her reflection is remarkable, then and now,
points toward conclusion or inevitability
associated with sensation, incandescent trails,
atmospheric friction and a sense of unease.
How much time has passed? Enough to succumb
to delusion. They talk at unexpected moments,
carry an ache, haunted by shock, grow into adults
who don’t believe in tragedy. Timelines converge.
I would like to report a glitch in the program and
attempt to define positive reinforcement. Absence
and unexpected encounters often signal heartbreak,
triggered by a mix of memories, loss and longing.
Look for related patterns, keep a mental inventory
of repetitions and closed loops, comfort each other
when psychic technologies are being designed
or powers and spiritual visions trick our eyes.
She is running now on autopilot, doesn’t think
it’s aliens or monsters, but there is evil out there.
He knows that eyesight alone isn’t reliable enough
to fill the gap between perception and truth.
Mind keeps us away from images we see but time
does not. Looking at each other is a long process,
as culture shifts away and lets out a guttural moan.
Our lives consist of only fragments. Time collapses.
2. HAUNTED (HE IS ALWAYS WITH US)
He already knows, attempts to make sense of the inexplicable, to throw himself into his work.
He becomes convinced, oblivious to what is really happening but his bliss is short-lived.
He calls out to her, can sense something. He cannot escape his own grief and regret, claims psychic abilities and paranormal experiences. He climbs up into darkness, continues to see unwanted memories, converts a romantic city into a gothic nightmare. His closed mind keeps him from listening.
He dives into the pond, does not yet know. He doesn’t believe, doesn’t speak, dramatizes the present and predicts the future.
He emphasizes the importance of inquiry.
His face falls flat, expressionless. He feels more patina than permanent, finally turns around. His fitful extrasensory perception is hard to comprehend. He follows her, follows his wife back home. His frame of vision is different.
He gets something stuck in his eye
He has a moment of prescience, has certainly made a mess of things. He has things to work on, heads to the church.
He insists that seeing is believing, is already a ghost. He is confronted with a situation, is desperately looking, is experiencing more premonitions, is hoping for more. He is in danger and must leave straightaway, is left behind to succumb to his delusions. He is mostly detached from his wife, is running on autopilot, is standing alone for the first time. He is trying to process an incomprehensible loss, is uncomfortable in holy spaces. He is usually seen during the night, is utterly convinced.
He knows how easily photos can be manipulated, knows something is wrong.
He looks at the glinting water outside, looks up as if he’s heard a cry, looks down, upset, lifeless.
He nearly falls, nearly falls.
He plays outside with not a care in the world, plays with optical illusions.
He rides in his own funeral procession.
He saw the horror of death, says he saw no evidence. He searches through books to find an answer. He sees a little girl, sees his wife on the boat. He shakes his head, swears.
He waits at the table, walks back to his hotel, watches as a woman is pulled from the water. He wonders if God’s children have stopped listening.
3. THE SUBCONSCIOUS MIND
Attempts to make sense of love
are sharpened by agony,
the inexplicable seems rational
in this mirror-twisted story.
Habitual moments lead up to
idyllic tragedy and questions.
It is impossible to find answers.
Ambiguity rules the world.
4. HAUNTED (SHORT-LIVED
His bliss is short-lived, his fitful extrasensory perception hard to comprehend. He attempts to throw himself into his work, is mostly detached from his wife.
He is standing alone for the first time. His face falls flat, expressionless. He looks worn down, upset, lifeless, is left behind to succumb to delusions, continue into darkness. He has a moment of prescience, dramatizes the present and predicts the future. His frame of vision is different.
He waits, looks at the glinting water outside. He saw the horror of death, continues to see it in unwanted memories. He cannot escape his own grief and regret.
He nearly falls, watches as a woman is pulled from the water, claims psychic abilities and paranormal experiences, converts a romantic city into a gothic nightmare.
He is experiencing more premonitions, is uncomfortable in holy spaces. He swears and kisses the Bishop.
He wonders if God’s children have stopped listening, is running on autopilot. He plays outside with not a care in the world, searches through books to find an answer.
He is usually seen during the night, feels more patina than permanent. He gets something stuck in his eye, plays with optical illusions, knows how easily photos can be manipulated.
He insists that seeing is believing. His closed mind keeps him from listening, he becomes oblivious to what is really happening.
He moves quickly, turns around, shakes his head, heads to the church. He looks up as if he’s heard a cry, can sense something. He already knows.
He continues on, utterly convinced, attempts to make sense of the inexplicable, trying to process an incomprehensible loss. He doesn’t speak, is already a ghost.
He walks back to his hotel, sees a little girl, calls out to her, follows her. He knows something is wrong, is confronted with a situation.
He has certainly made a mess of things, doesn’t believe. He is in danger and must leave straightaway.
5. THE DREAM GIVES HER THE ANSWER
The uncanny takes a long time to visit
outsiders who are simply trying to be
good but have never actually existed.
Seeing is hard to comprehend, may
relate to believing in the dreamtime,
in forgotten memories on repeat.
Chasing phantoms is a kind of limbo,
a grotesque immediacy of sorrow
one can never again escape except
for semi-experimental editing and
discussions about the boundaries
of intuition and elliptical science.
Anyone who has seen weird things
will recognize the existence of aliens,
no matter how far they run from us.
During a psychic connection with
the deceased it seems that the end
involves nothing too outlandish
but causes stars to twinkle and bodies
to dehydrate and discolour, then find
themselves lost tourists in the world.
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© Rupert M Loydell
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