Rolling Truths from

Haiku News


‘Cocaine and me, by David Cameron’

Benedict Brogan and Jane Merrick

21 October 2005 Daily Mail



Does Rebekah Brooks,

The former editor of

The News of the World,


Have, as it’s rumoured,

A photograph of someone

Who’s snorting cocaine


From Sam Cameron’s breasts?

And could this perhaps be why

The Prime Minister


Is anxious to please

The Murdoch Empire, by his

Engaging its staff


As his own PR?

By supporting wars Murdoch

Supports, like Iraq


Libya and Iran?

“I won’t hear a word against her.

She lends me her horse” –


As the Premier

Might say, if he was challenged.

Tories think themselves,


And always have done,

As pure as the driven snow.

They don’t do ‘Sorry’…


Despite organizing

A lynch mob in Libya, which

Left eight thousand dead


For oil – done because

Gaddaffi was promoting

African Dollars,


Based on Libyan gold,

And the US didn’t like that.

Saddam, same story –


He wanted to sell

Oil in Euros, not dollars.

So both were demonized –


The US gangster’s rivals

Had to be killed, along with Iraqi

And Libyan children.


Eager British attack-dogs

Doing US dirty work

Joined in. Hired thugs


Found Libya’s leader

And sneakily found their way

To his rectum


Under his djellaba

They knifed him there over and again.

Their drones bombed his house.


Cameron said that

They’d done “a very good job”.

And he said the same,


Visiting Kabul,

“Bloody good job” he declared,

After four hundred


British troops had died

“Stopping another 9/11”

As if Afghan kids


Killed by US drones

(Now directed by GCHQ

From trendy Gloucestershire)


Were really a threat

To his pet Wall Street bankers,

Or Etonian chums.


Tony Montana

In Scarface, couldn’t invent

Such lunacy.


Want to join the mad club?

Snort some blow with Obama?

Kill Afghan goatherds?


Pretend you’re saving

Western civilization,

Like Winston Churchill?


Whose constant killing –

His Dresden terror bombing

And use of poison gas


And needless slaughter –

Drove him to drink. Now Cameron

Has the same dead look


Of the control freak

For whom coke’s the drug of choice:

Sucked into the brain


Through fifty pound notes

Careless of who’s killed en route

In Columbia.


Here’s cocaine’s secret:

It’s awful. Tories love it.

They feel powerful.


Cocaine’s made with bleach,

Benzene and sulphuric acid

In jungle clearings.


It leaves permanent traces

Based on the chemicals used.

Makes people nasty.


Scars their brain for life.

They unconsciously re-live

That chemical assault.


“I always tell the truth”,

Said Tony Montana

“Even when I lie.”


Coked out politicians

Like Bush and now Cameron

Share Scarface’s sociopathy.


Controlled by their dealers –

(For drug dealers read bankers)–

They become neurotic sadists.


‘Sell off everything!

To pay the dealers we owe!

Can’t owe our dealers!


So, sell all our roads!

Our pillar boxes, our fields!

And all our farmland!


‘Sell hospital beds!

Sell off school playgrounds!

Let’s just snort money!


‘Can’t owe the dealers,

The bankers, who put us into power.

Can’t owe the dealers. Rule One.’


But keep the Royal Family.

They’re the Tories’ lucky charm.

The mildewed corpses


In the Bates Motel –

The English House of Horror

At the end of the Mall…


You might like to watch

This haiku for rolling news

As more comes to light.


Want to meet Cameron?

A quarter of a million

Says that he’s all yours.


Heathcote Williams
Illustration Nick Victor















By Heathcote Williams

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